by admin | Feb 5, 2026 | Power in our Words
By Scott Hilgendorff / Cowboys of the Cross“I’m sorry for what I said when we were working with cattle.”
That’s a form of a joke we see about how working with horses and cattle can bring out the worst in us, particularly causing us to swear or have angry outbursts.
We all know the idea of taking a breath and counting to 10 to give us time to calm down but there’s also a biblical way to do this.
James 3 tells us about how much power our words have to do great harm. He uses the example of a bit in a horse’s mouth or the rudder of a ship to make clear how something that seems so small is capable of controlling the direction we take. It can lead us into great evil with the power to destroy. In studies in bullying, there’s research that shows how girls tend to stay on another girl they target relentlessly from face-to-face confrontations to attacks across social media. They are capable of using their words to push someone to suicide though this has happened in both boys and girls.
James isn’t exaggerating in how much evil our words can do. He calls them a ‘restless evil’ and a ‘deadly poison.
I’ve witnessed rodeo cowboys spread rumors that have forced someone to leave the industry even though they knew the stories were likely to be false.
James 3:3-8 When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. 4 Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. 5 Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. 6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. 7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
James makes the point that no human can bring the tongue under control. While it’s easier to choose not to intentionally do harm or spread gossip, it’s so easy to say harmful words in anger.
Earlier in his book, James addresses part of this in James 1:19 saying “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”
Now, James seems to be telling us there’s nothing we can do about it but he’s saying no human can tame the tongue, he isn’t saying that it can’t be. We serve and worship a God who can control everything. Instead of taking a breath and counting to 10, we need to take that breath and pray for God to take our anger away or to give us the right words to say.
God will control our tongue if we let Him and we can hold back from doing genuine evil in the world around us.
by admin | Jan 12, 2026 | Power in our Words
By Scott Hilgendorff / Cowboys of the Cross
The words we speak to someone have the power to be someone’s breaking point or they can become that person’s turning point
The Bible teaches a lot about the power of our words. In Ephesians, Paul gives us some encouragement in what we should say and why.
Ephesians 4:29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
First, Paul instructs us not to speak gossip, vulgarities, profanities, anything that would harm what it looks like to be a follower of Jesus.
Instead, he wants our words to be directed toward lifting others up.
In the rodeo community, the cowboy crowd is actually used to doing that. Whether on the timed event of the arena or the rough stock, we all know how to lift another person up, either with praises about the run or ride they had or encouragement if they missed their catch. Constructive criticism is welcome and serves to build that person up by helping them improve and learn from where they might have gone wrong.
The same needs to be extended to the world around us. That can be a lot harder. It’s easier to be unkind to total strangers. Social media has made that easier for us but now it carries over into the real world and the people we interact with there. It should be easy to hold our tongue when a server in a restaurant is terrible or when our wives or girlfriends get under our skin. And better yet, we should be looking for opportunities to lift that person up. God puts people in front of us every day who we have no idea what they are going through, good or bad.
Speaking angrily or in frustration and being unkind can be the last straw for that person while offering a kind work or encouragement can be what gives someone at the end of their rope the real hope they needed.
And when someone has been torn down by corrupting talk, it’s a lot harder for someone else to come along and build someone up when they have a lot further to go. A foundation of kind words and encouragement that you’ve already left means the person gets lifted even higher if the next person comes along with a positive comment.
Sure we all have people we don’t like. Sometimes we’re given good reason to not like that person. The expression, “if you can’t say anything good about someone, don’t say anything at all,” really kicks in at that moment. We can at the very least avoid them or refrain from gossping to someone else. Better yet, Paul wants us to still find a way to be encouraging.
Why does that matter? When Paul says our encouragement gives grace to others, what it does is opens up the opportunity to tell others what it means to have a saving faith in Jesus. We are never going to find opportunities to bring that up in conversation with someone who we have torn down. And if we’re known to be Christians, it makes it harder for the next person to share Jesus is the example we have set has been discouraging instead of encouraging.
Look for opportunities in front of you this week to be an encouragement.
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