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I guess I had always been a Christian, at least since I was three or four. There were times I wondered and thought maybe I wasn't but it all came back to that time I had on our living room couch asking Jesus to be the Lord of my life.

As far as really living and knowing what that meant or even trying to have a close relationship with God went I guess I just didn't and didn't care to until a bit later on in life. I was about 15 when the hard times started coming in and I had nowhere to turn except God. He seemed like an easy way out anyway....I would get into trouble, run to God, give it all to Him, He would pull me out and I would go back to trouble again.

It seemed to stay that way until I couldn't take stabbing Him in the back one more time and I gave up and told God that it didn't matter what He wanted me to do I was His and I was willing to do anything to make sure I stayed where He wanted me to.

That was the day I heard about the Bible school that was going on in my home town, and it changed me forever! I found God to be more than the one I ran to in trouble and more than the one scolding me for the stupid stuff I had done. He was my best friend and the one I ran to for love when I couldn't find it anywhere else, the one I ran to when I was in trouble because He loves me and wants the best for me and I want to please Him more than anything in the world. The one I go to for forgiveness because it doesn't matter how bad I mess up or how bad my life may seem or how stupid I am at times or what bull-headed ignorant trash I give out He is always wanting to pour out His blessing on me and say that I am highly favored by Him! I found my best friend and I tell you what, through thick and thin, whatever may come I am His because you just can't get anybody better!

Jonathan felt like he

stabbed God in the back

Jonathan Longwell, Craig, Colorado